Day 30: Gruel

Gruel (groo-uhl)—noun : a light, usually thin, cooked cereal made by boiling meal, esp. oatmeal, in water or milk.

Charles Dickens.  Seriously, how
can anyone not like a guy with a
beard like this?



So, I was sitting in my office today, eating my pumpkin oatmeal when I realized I was really eating gruel.  I mean, don't get me wrong, the pumpkin oatmeal is something everyone should try, it is pretty good, but it doesn't look that appetizing.  Today I warmed it up in the microwave at work, and I must have forgotten to stir it or something because there was this big, cold lump in the middle of it.  It was just awful.  I was contemplating what a sorry state I was in, that I had to eat gruel, and I remembered a book that I had read a few years ago that talked about the good qualities of gruel. 

Oliver Twist is a great book.  Like all of Dicken's stuff, it is way too long with about six hundred characters (okay, there are actually only 32, but 32 people is a lot to keep up with in a book).  Most of them have crazy, but informative names, such as Mr. Bumble, Mr. Fang, Duff and Blathers, The Artful Dodger, Mr. Grimwig, and Nancy.  There is this one part in the book that is great.  It involves the protagonist, little Oliver Twist (who I think is such a sweet little boy—sure, he turned to a life of crime, but we all know he was forced into it), who has been "bad" (he really wasn't that bad, it is just, like all Dicken's novels, everyone is working against the poor lad).  Anyway, this is the explanation of why Oliver is such a terrible boy:

"Meat, ma'am, meat," replied Bumble, with stern emphasis.  "You've over-fed him, ma'am.  You've raised an artificial soul and spirit in him, ma'am, unbecoming a person of his condition, as the board, Mrs. Sowerberry, who are practical philosophers, will tell you.  What have paupers to do with soul or spirit either?  It's quite enough that we let 'em have little bodies.  If you had kept the boy on gruel, ma'am, this would never have happened."

"Dear, dear!" ejaculated Mrs. Sowerberry, piously raising her eyes to the kitchen ceiling.  "This comes of being liberal!"

Isn't that a great dialog?  No wonder everyone loves Dickens.  Anyway, as I thought about my gruel, I realized that if I had been eating gruel every day, I probably would have never gotten myself in the position of having to go on a diet in the first place.  Meat, my friends, meat.  I have over-fed myself and if I had kept myself on gruel, this would have never happened.  Oh well, I guess I am going to have to just start liking gruel.  It isn't the worst thing I have had to do.  But please, be worried for me if you hear me saying "Please, sir, I want some more."